What to say....

I haven't had very many things to post about lately.  Not a whole lot going on so this post will be somewhat random.

Last night I went to the Tim McGraw concert at the State Fair.  Ever since I paid for my ticket I was wishing that I hadn't spent the money on it but it was totally worth it.  Our seats weren't the greatest but he is an amazing live singer.  It was a lot of fun. 
I hadn't been to the State Fair in probably 10 years and after being there yesterday, I am almost certain I will never go again.  I'm not a big fan of crowds and this was just too much for me.  Not really fun unless you're the person who likes going for the rides or to pig out on the fair food.  I did try a piece of deep fried alligator though... It was interesting, similar to calamari. 
The people I went with (not including my actual friend) are definitely not people I would want to hang out with on a regular basis.  Every single one of them smokes, a lot, and swear like sailors.  Some of them have kids and I've seen how they interact with them.... I feel bad for those kids. 

Recently I came across a song and I can't stop listening to it. It's by a singer who I can't stand and I feel really stupid for liking this song but I can't help it... I don't know what it is but it's just stuck in my head. I even bought it from iTunes!   "When I Look At You" by Miley Cyrus. I'm curious what my play count is up to now......

I'm having a hard time settling on the book I am going to read.  In the past couple of weeks, I have started several different books but never finished them.  A few nights ago I started Gone With The Wind which happens to be one of my favorites.  I read maybe 10 pages that night and haven't read or wanted to read anymore ever since.  Around that same time someone recommended A Farewell To Arms by Ernest Hemingway. I got it today and am looking forward to starting it but am a little worried that the same thing might happen.  It doesn't have anything to do with my disinterest in the book, my failure at GWTW proves that but maybe the books I've started haven't been fitting my particular mood.  Hopefully that phase is out the window because it would be nice to finish a book.

Tonight was a music shuffling kind of night so here are the songs I actually listened to all the way through.....

Chase This Light - Jimmy Eat World
I Could Have Lied - Red Hot Chili Peppers
Infra Red - Placebo
The Greatest Lie - Circa Survive
Forgive - Rebecca Lynn Howard
Audrey, Start The Revolution - Anberlin
Ugly Side - Blue October
Misery Business - Paramore
All Comes Out In The Wash - Thornley
Exo-Politics - Muse
Again I Go Unnoticed - Dashboard Confessional
Sweetness - Jimmy Eat World
Everything's Wrong - Crossfade
Dead In The Water - Hawthorne Heights
If This Is The End - Faith Hill

And now I'm off to start the book and get some sleep before work tomorrow morning.

Depressing songs and movies

So another topic I came across on PSC has piqued my interest.  Someone was looking for suggestions of depressing movies for when they are depressed.  The first reply mentioned watching happy/funny movies instead of depressing movies but the topic creator wanted none of that and I agree.  I replied to the topic with a few of my own depressing suggestions but in this blog entry I want to express my opinion on the first reply. 

Personally, when I am depressed, I don't want to watch a movie where people are happy and laughing and making jokes.  It always ruins that movie for me.  I never laugh even though I know deep down that it's funny and would laugh at it any other time I had chosen to watch it.  It almost makes me feel worse because I know I should be laughing but just somehow I can't.  Part of it too is that I feel jealous of the happy laughing people on the screen.  Ridiculous I know... They are fictional characters but still, the feeling is there. 
Same thing goes with listening to music.  I don't want to listen to happy songs filled with inspiration and delight.  I want to listen to something I can identify with in that moment in time.  I want to connect to the music I'm listening to.  Sometimes I just feel down for no specific reason and when I feel like that, I want to just ride it out.  The only thing that really makes me feel better is going to sleep after wallowing and waking up to a new day.
Scarlett O'Hara said it best in Gone With The Wind.... "After all, tomorrow is another day."

I'm not saying that the first reply was wrong.  If happy/funny movies make that person feel better... go for it.  Do what makes you happy.  Different things make different people feel better. 

And if anyone was wondering what my depressing movie suggestions were... here they are:
White Oleander
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Requiem For A Dream
American Beauty

White Picket Fence

So PSC is too busy today so I can't get on.  I saw a topic the other day that I've wanted to post on but it was something I wanted to think a little about.  The topic is about what your white picket fence is or what you envision to be your ideal life. So here is what I hope for my life.

I want to live near the mountains, surrounded by trees in a house with a wrap around porch. It would be perfect for sitting around at night, looking at the stars, watching storms, or just relaxing.  I hope to find the man of my dreams, someone who shares similar ideals and values.  Someone I can grow old with and have a family with.  Someone who loves me for me.  I haven't had a real pet since I was a toddler so I would love to have a few dogs.  I'd like a career that I can enjoy and not dread having to go to work everyday.  I love traveling so I hope to see as much of the world as I possibly can.

I'm a fairly simple girl so a life filled with laughter and meaningful moments would be enough to satisfy me.